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SUSPECT STORIES  Zombies are people too!
Do Zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? No, they eat
their fingers separately. Recipes, potions & spells for the wing-nut on the go. _______________________________________________________________________________________________ Skeletons exist on absolutely nothing for centuries. How do they survive? Secrets revealed! ________________________________________________________________________________________________ MOANERS & GROANERS Why do you always find ghouls and demons together? Because demons are a ghoul's best friend!
Why don't angry
witches ride their brooms? How do you mend a broken Jack-o-lantern? With a pumpkin
patch Why was the mummy so tense? He
was all wound up When
does a skeleton laugh? What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant? Spare ribs Why does Dracula consider himself a good artist? What's a vampire's favorite candy? A sucker WARNING! Do you suffer from Holloweenie-Brain?.... Take the Test. 1. Enhanced alter ego? 2. Out of wardrobe experiences? 3. Diminished responsibility? 4.
An overwhelming desire to be strange and ugly? 5. Irrational
impulse to be creative and giggle? 6. A deep compulsion to scare folks?
If you are crying because at last someone understands.......we can help!
Embrace the dark side.... it's fast, free and easy....... Submit now! Don't get all philosophical about it! .........Call our 24/7 help line ......Toll free 1- 666 OURS OULS
Breaking!........... Two skeletons got entangled, then decided to break off.
Vampire Celebs....... "It was love at first bite"
Local dig uncovers 2000 year old witch remains ..........still sticky after all those years! DNA sent to labs for analisys......."This is the stickiest, stinkiest witch I've ever had to deal with" expert reveals.
Gravedigger accidentally digs own grave!
SHOCKING NEWS! More and more skeletons ravaged by excessive
hydrochloric acid consumption. "Not having a throat or esophagus, when they drink the stuff it just seems to go everywhere" Doctor explains. "It's not just the throat, it get all over the ribcage, the pelvis and the knees and just eats them away to nothing......." Parents of younger skeletons are desperate!
Albert Schmidt - One of the humour's
founding fathers. Albert was a very funny chap. He graduated from the Bavarian Academy of Humour laughing his way through a side splitting academic career. His final thesis "An Anthropological Analysis of the Role of the Joke in Dutch Society" won him meteoric fame with the Dutch who embraced his ideas with typical poker faced detachment............ but in vast numbers. Introducing humour to the Dutch was his career's crowning glory: a colossal piece of social engineering on a par with the Polder Reclamation Projects. A true hero who, inspired with success, went on to meet his demise attempting to introduce humour into Norway... it was Albert's Waterloo. He tried to make light of it but succumbed to a terminal case of inflamed grumpy glands and sadly passed away without so much as a giggle. He died in nineteen hundred and fish and chips... His last words apparently were "Martha, Where did you put the Javex?" The zenith of his spirit is still celebrated in community food halls and
canteens all over Norway, where pockets of humour gained a stubborn foothold. In sympathetic parts Albert was considered
the patron saint of all things that aren't serious. In other parts however he was reviled as a revolutionary spreading
laughter. His pioneering spirit lives amongst us today and Norwegian children laugh and play round his statue completely unaware of Albert's heroic struggle. "Ya Norwegian people make plenty laughing now." Said Haans Haansonson. "We especially laugh at Canadian comedian Stephen Harper...
Yar! Ha! Ha! Ha! Very funny man with very funny hair Yar! Har! Har!
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